Landlord Jokes

A pub landlord is casually pulling a pint when a tramp/hobbo walks in and asks for a toothpick, so the landlord giuves him one. A few minutes later, another tramp walks in and asks for a toothpick so the landlord gives him one. A few minutes after this, another tramp walks in and asks for …

Male Code of Ethics Joke

1. Thou shall not rent the movie Chocolat or Sweet November. 2. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. 3. Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his fellow partygoers. 4. When you are queried by a buddy’s wife, girlfriend, mother, father, priest, …

Archbishop and Doctor Jokes

A woman starts dating a married doctor. Before too long, she becomes pregnant and they don’t know what to do. About nine months later, just about the time she is going to give birth, a priest goes into the hospital for a prostate gland infection. The doctor says to the woman, “I know what we’ll …

President Jokes

1) president bush walks into a restaurant with his cabinet to order dinner and the waiter asks, “would you like the roast beef special?” and the president says, “yes”, and then the waiter asks, “and what about the vegetables?”, and the president replies, “oh, they’ll have the same” 2) the president is in the basement …

Definition of Terms Joke

Butt (but) n. Female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes “look bigger.” Male: What you slap when someone’s scored a touchdown, homerun, or goal. Commitment (ko-mit-ment) n. Female: A desire to get married and raise a family. Male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one’s girlfriend Communication …

Hunter Joke

The big game hunter walked in the bar and bragged to everyone about his hunting skills. The man was undoubtedly a good shot and no one could dispute that. But then he said that they could blindfold him and he would recognise any animal’s skin from its feel, and if he could locate the bullet …

Man Prank Joke | Talk Funny Jokes

a man is at work and calls his wife and a strange voice answers. “hello?” says the strange voice “who is this” says the man “this is the maid” says the strange voice “i dont have a maid” says the man “i was hired today by your wife” says the maid “let me talk to …

Marriage Test Joke | Talk Funny Jokes

I have been engaged for almost a year. I am to be married nextn month. My fiance’s mother is great. She is putting the entire wedding together and invited me to her place to go over the invitation list because it had grown a bit beyond what we had expected it to be. When I …

Larry Joke | Talk Funny Jokes

Larry looks around the room and sees that it is in a perfect order, spotless, clean. So’s the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table “Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you.” So he goes to the kitchen and sure …

Divorce Joke | Talk Funny Jokes

A man was standing in court explaining to the judge his grounds for divorce. ” Your honor I wish to sue for divorce on the grounds that I live in a two story house.” The judge questioned as to why living in a two story house was grounds for divorce. The man responded, “Well its …